My social anxiety has been at its lowest ever in life. Almost to the point of "WHO GIVES A FUCK ANYMORE"
Work is great. I feel like NEO in the Matrix...."i know you're out there, i feel you now.. i know that you're afraid....."..i understand every issue, and its like i can single-handedly solve all of Microsoft's problems.
On wednesday, i finally decided to settle down and start on that 'music stuff' which i've been just too lazy to stroke the past 2 years...after much pestering from shiping and perhaps....he and shiya have been intensely debating the issue, so i gotta do something about it. Rushed straight home, on wednesday to decide and rally my lieutenants and plan, this time seriously.
Thursday, we drafted a practise.
Today, got back to manage whatever.....string my guitar and the tuning peg broke. But the stars were kind enough to hold a Yamaha clearance sale tmr at clementi, so yes this time i'm pulling money out from my own pocket to fork for it.
I felt bad all this while, cos i'm constantly giving empty promises to everybody.
And as you can see...its been a long time since ive been like this. A state of zen. Where nothing is as lethargic or as orgasmic or that things don't matter.
Thinking of taking japanese classes too, for 2 reasons.....its not just microsoft...its about greater employabilty..... having survived at the office in the past month have allowed me to see that not only is social dominance important, it is nothing without tools to make yourself indispensable..and also my interest of being that citizen of the globe.....(embracing some of that hippie free-love.)....and more diverse mating opportunities!....i've been there before, months back... lost in translation around kayoko...shall get my parents to fund this venture..
Money is still tight...still need money for the trips...damn!


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