Logically speaking

If you want a girl, go ahead and take it.

Especially when she is obviously interested.

I don't understand what exactly is up with the "moral dilemma"?? Why am i afraid to make a move when it is so obvious?

Treating someone with respect, does not encompass being fearful of what she might think of you.

Many times i am afraid to touch a girl because of this normative argument that we are disrespecting her. I doubt we are really that noble. I think what i am really afraid of, this deep psychological fear that she does not like me. And not really that it is wrong. There is nothing wrong! Just me justifying its wrongness to prevent myself from doing it, and preventing myself from risk of failure. This wrongness ends up being a blanket that covers all scenarios, even the opportunities.

Whenever faced with the situation, of whether to touch a girl, whether to escalate, whether to do it in front of everyone...... this fear of judgment is irrational. This fear/boundary exists without physiological arousal, thus one goes unaware throughout life that such a fear exist.

Just tell yourself, WAIT. what exactly is wrong if i "do this"? Oh.. theres nothing wrong. Do it.

Of course even if you manage to clear this mental obstacle, theres still the obstacle of "conversation".

To succeed with girls:
1) deal with fear. 2) practice conversation.

Lost

2 years of complacency can cause me to lose myself.

My inner voice is no longer clear, i am having empty conversations.

And i sought to find the well-rehearsed monologues that made me so popular amongst my friends.

Its funny how a couple of well-managed conversational threads and carefully engineered interactions with people can do your life.

I use to speak of faith and passion, now i speak of fear.

Rules of the Evolutionary Game

I am inclined to write a post about polyamory as the superior system as opposed to monogamous arrangements in developed societies.

While what is natural does not make it right. What is "right" is a system of norms. We deem actions unethical to reduce grief, jealousy and really painful emotions to humans in modern societies. But just because its painful does not make it wrong. Just because its painful does not mean we should totally build a system to avoid it completely. Nature isn't cruel, nature is fair. It is humans who are bitter about it. Marriage is fair to humans, if humans are equal, assuming humans are equal. We are disrupting a system of nature, because humans are not equal, and we benefit from having only superior genes propagate.

A system of less restraint, polyamory, while more painful, also ensures that evolutionary selective pressures remain strong and favoring superior genes.

To understand the curse that befall an individual that upholds the ethical principles/social norms of monogamy. Besides putting him in a constant denial and internal conflict, but mainly, reduces his desirability as a mate. He/she is essentially putting a barrier in front of him/her against interested mates thereby preventing his/her mating success merely to uphold a set of rules that prevent "emotional hurt" to others.

Is trying to prevent emotional "hurt" (if we can call it that, emotions are simply there to guide us, "hurt" is a signal, not a disastrous consequence.) upholding humanity? Is prevent emotional "hurt" to others, respecting our own emotions?

Marriage can be such a collective state of denial, a wuss way of handling your "hurt" by condemning our promiscuous wirings, when many tribal societies go around it by simply accepting it instead of coming up with a restrictive construct such as marriage. (Read more on the Masai people and their sexual practices, well or any other tribe. Perhaps even sexual practices in rural parts of Asia.)

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I think after we come to terms with our own internal ethics that have been so senselessly distorted by social norms, we can come to live fully with ourselves and remove that barrier that prevents us sexual access and live complete.

Decision Rules

for how long would i keep trading my soul to bondage?

because i have to live up to others expectations, i can never live out my own choices.

and people will always judge your choices as irresponsible and selfish to bent you to acquiesce to meet their own demands.

And i am sorry that while in the middle of that, i may have profited from the bargain by choosing to deal... maybe because humans can't seem to walk away from that one-time gratification, relief from stress and pain, fifteen minutes of fame, anything that is glittery... the deal was never an equal exchange, the lure is irresistible but you've paid for more than what its worth.

 "This is the story about us, being persuaded to spend money we don't have on things we don't need in order to create impressions which won't last on people we don't care about. - Tim Jackson

Do you need wealth, do you need sex? Some of it, but it does not rule your life.

Sometimes you gotta ask yourself the real reason behind the goals and dreams that you have and wonder if it for things that you are paying too huge a price for. It as simple as humans' choice for high-caloric foods and high-sugar, habits today that are maladaptive, habits that evolved at a time when such choices were scarce and we unconsciously magnify the value of these items that drive our impulses MORE than dirt.

this greed that may have served your genes well to transcend successive generations, may be the vulnerability that will make you easy prey to whoever understands to make use of you.

sometimes the face of evil is your greatest education and your greatest redemption.

Thats it.

Out out out... Thats it. I'm making a run for it.

No more being with people who just wants to bring you down.