i was going to do this earlier...but i got into some entanglements....
i was trying to teach someone something i observed..but then it soon spiralled into this debate which intellectuals have to externally validate themselves and get reassuarance for their believes if they win.
i am so guilty of that right now....i talked about this before, but sometimes we go into it...and before we realise, its too late. Oh dear, the mysteries of the human psyche....
this is going to be a short blast...i intended to title this entry "My awesome experiences in Self-Discovery"....yes, thats external validation.
but i was going to give a few ppl a big thank you that have given me a deeper grounding....so i'll just do that and get ahead with my day.
Evan - The guy who grew up with years of experience in theatre. i like to see him as my mentor. I still do, sometimes. Its not that i think i'm better now. Thanks for teaching me so much, about managing my emotions and being a great contributor to my self-help journey, that it would be a long list if i listed everything you told me.
Papa(from the Game) - World-reknown marketing guru of Pickup, which has shaped the business it is today. It was kind of you to let me crash the workshop. Had a twenty minute conversation with this guy. I was switched off most of the time...his strong accent which i could not follow half the time....and you were probably tired when you shared you experiences with me that it sounded dead, though the content was the opposite.
Shane - for giving me a glimpse into getting girls in clubs. though you did all this thru own experiences and knew nothing about pua. From what you said, i know you're right...He possesses the vibe, humour, dominance, right frames...
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Quick update
Karl - Very socially aware, astute as well. But lack motivation and determination. Cool, but you need the self-belief of csm.
Staff barry - Overwhelming self-belief. rejects openly anybody who trys to tie him down. can't say that its a bad thing. so motivated that sometimes you're not in touch with the lesser beings around you, that you may seem like an outcast.
Chik - great storyteller.
Janice - great character and frame. the cute bouncy girl vibe. even without looks you can bag any guy.
The past 83 sets - i learnt the most from so far. I learn 80% from here. Calibration. Understanding myself.Understanding you. Everyone of you was unique, thats why i approached you. The moments we shared may be lasting in your mind, but i'm sorry that i'll forget them soon with more coming each day. Even though some of you rejected me outright for how ridiculous i was...haha..i know i added drama to you life. You'll be laughing it with all your friends about how once, this weird guy told you you were pretty.
Raline Shah - No. 84.... Top 5 for miss indonesia? The indonesian expat. holier than thou. When i approached you, i never thought you were a celebrity to begin with. I even fumbled with your name. There are prettier girls.
When i searched you on facebook, that aura of success that i could not neglect. I was like 'Little Miss Sunshine", and her dream of becoming Miss USA...
My realm of possility has suddenly expanded. You made me realise how everything that i'm working on could be possible, though you ignored my email.
Miss universe pagents are suppose to be a show where role-models and modern-day heroes for women are created.
You are my Oprah Winfrey, my latest inspiration.
Thats a wrap of the ppl that has kept me going for, the past 5 weeks. We fail more than we suceed. And the recent failure to get any response from raline only pushed me more towards my dreams. We want what we can't have, and thats why we don't want death. The lessons that i've learnt from the 84 sets, i don't see them as failures...after awhile its like this social experiment thats for this higher purpose. What constitutes sucess? i've made friends, gotten numbers emails, friends from across borders(Hi Bo!)
There is no philosopher stone even though we like to think we're getting there. Einstein didn't stop at E=mc^2. Movie producers don't just win their oscars. Rock stars avoid being one-hit wonders.
Its not about success or failures. Its how each of them wants to live every single day of their lives doing exactly what they feel like doing. What they want for themselves. We are never contend with just success, we want more and more. And thats why i'm working on myself to accumulate more and more.
With our powers combined...
Ziqzak
P.S as you can see, i'm still figuring it out, i only know the lifestyle that i want, and how i'm going to acheive them. 3 more months till i get out of army, and have my weekdays once again. "YOU LOCKED ME UP IN THIS BURIAL FOR 2000 YEARS!!! FACE MY WRATH!!!" Don't you see? at the dawn of the human race, generations past, its like we're just waiting then till we come into the world today.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Shiya's shit-tests and wake up calls.
i'm going to make this short, cos my posts are frickin long.
initially i was going to talk about the night i had and how it had got my mind boggled up with things of the past, and future, about myself...more and less i was emotionally vulnerable..
i was going to give my observations on every single one of you, and the things i learnt... but a new relevation occured after this, and now i wanna talk about that....
despite the negative vibe, and my stubborness boring into your minds....you guys managed to pump me into an emotional state, and i see value in that.......................what am i saying?
i'm sure it struck a chord with everyone.....the group was in need of someone to lead emotionally... no one stood up....i could have, but i was too selfish, i wasn't in the moment but constantly thinking of getting out.
i was constantly reflecting upon myself....everyone made me see a side of myself that i was struggling to get out of.
anyway, we had a talk while on the mrt on the way home....it just so happens with me all the time....i use to consciously pull ppl into an 'eliciting values' state...talking about the future and stuff.....i actually hate it....cos a few weeks ago i realised how desperate it all sounded.
it makes us look at what we don't have....what could be better...what we could be...that we miss the good things all around us.........
i hated it, after i realise that with some friends that i was talking to.....i pumped so much emotion...that ppl started telling me off...
anyway, i unconsciously led into the same topic again today......
iufdgkisjblgiuhsad;lioha;okfnlakjdga
Life is a bunch of fleeting emotions......we are here and there all at once...swung around by a storm, seas of emotions....................................shit shit shit...
thats it and good night!
initially i was going to talk about the night i had and how it had got my mind boggled up with things of the past, and future, about myself...more and less i was emotionally vulnerable..
i was going to give my observations on every single one of you, and the things i learnt... but a new relevation occured after this, and now i wanna talk about that....
despite the negative vibe, and my stubborness boring into your minds....you guys managed to pump me into an emotional state, and i see value in that.......................what am i saying?
i'm sure it struck a chord with everyone.....the group was in need of someone to lead emotionally... no one stood up....i could have, but i was too selfish, i wasn't in the moment but constantly thinking of getting out.
i was constantly reflecting upon myself....everyone made me see a side of myself that i was struggling to get out of.
anyway, we had a talk while on the mrt on the way home....it just so happens with me all the time....i use to consciously pull ppl into an 'eliciting values' state...talking about the future and stuff.....i actually hate it....cos a few weeks ago i realised how desperate it all sounded.
it makes us look at what we don't have....what could be better...what we could be...that we miss the good things all around us.........
i hated it, after i realise that with some friends that i was talking to.....i pumped so much emotion...that ppl started telling me off...
anyway, i unconsciously led into the same topic again today......
iufdgkisjblgiuhsad;lioha;okfnlakjdga
Life is a bunch of fleeting emotions......we are here and there all at once...swung around by a storm, seas of emotions....................................shit shit shit...
thats it and good night!
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
