Food Review 1, Rotten Tomatoes where they belong.

It is with my utmost disappointment that i write this to you today. And though i do not have any pictures to proof, being a connoisseur of all things fine..... you have to trust my words.

I've never written a food review before...this is absolutely not experimental and purely instigated by the misleading marketing but poor products.

I skipped breakfast today besides just having 2 softboil eggs for protein....and was so looking forward to an indulging meal at Wendy's joint that sprouted out of the middle of nowhere between Boonlay MRT and Jurong point near where i live...... It certainly projected the idea of a depot of gleaming hope with its big red signage, strategically situated in the middle of nowhere like the Great Pyramid of Giza in the middle of the desert.

I like the place and its ambience if its not for the bad quality food. Inside, there are no tables...just two long "bar" tables all perpendicularly placed, outlining and facing the glass windows/walls....(and some small circular tables where you eat standing.) Nice to be able to eat and people-watch, cute girls passing by just 1-2 metres away outside, in the day or the evenings.

Standing 3 meters from the counter, i analysed the possible permutations of food which i will get to obtain optimal indulgence, value-for-money and serving size. I opted for, a 1/2 quarter pound medium combo $7.85 + $0.50, a small tub of "chili"(the minced beef/beans/peppers mix thingy available in american restaurants.) $2.60 and a swap of the drink to chocolate milkshake additional $0.40

I was really hungry at this point of time......tasted the fries and chili first....didn't improve my appetite at all, supposedly i was very hungry.. Tried to take a sip at the chocolate milkshake using their thin straws.....left me more impatient than ever.....quickly unwrapped the burger kept in silver foil. (FYI, studies have shown that silver foil drives the idea that the food within it is fresh into our subconscious....which explains why butter and margarine are always wrapped in silver foil.)

Took the first bite....and a tidal wave of disappointment floods my body.....you know how it feels when you're sexually aroused and all that feel-good chemicals, oxytocin, dopamine, dolphins, endorphins starts to swim around and flood your physical senses?.....put a negative sign to that equation and thats how it feels to be TURNED OFF.

I forced myself thru this meal just so to fill my stomach....and after having lost almost a kg through all the late nights the past week...i didn't bother to finish the last bit of the burger, nor the last few strandling fries, nor the beans in the chili....spent a few seconds picking out the minced beef to chew for pure amusement......and the milkshake, yeah...(you should never get milkshake from fast food places ever!.......only billy bombers serves good milkshakes because they use B&J icecream.)......the milkshake was so thick, i gave up giving the thin straw a blowjob....cos not much seems to enter my mouth after trying for sometime....

My list of other much-hyped-about failures include:

1. T.G.I. Friday's

well the other places are not even worth my time mentioning.....

I've been to Chilli's once, but i'm can't judge because i was there for my friend's bday in january and i wasn't really tasting the food properly....thus i'm sure it isn't as great as it cracked up to be...cos my attention wasn't drawn to the food that much that day...

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Of course, this random observation brings me to my NEXT observation.. Singapore, and its lack of colour...

Wendy's, TGI Fridays, Carl's Jr, Burger King, Macdonalds.....or Koi's bubble tea(Good, but still not as interesting as the choices that Taiwan offer...)..and anything "novel" that was introduced to differentiate from the already current onslaught of things to experience in Singapore......probably great at their country of origin.....but poorly established here in singapore...

Its not the company, its not the culture nor the marketing or any external factor...its the people.

Whatever uni you're going into, NUS, NTU, or SMU......an elite or humble neighbourhod jc, secondary, primary school.....seemingly diverse from the outside......we're still a bunch of losers deep inside....we just can't escape the fact we're......"a lot of bad things all together"...

Sigh, lack the energy today to engage in a heated criticism of the world...another time.

This zombie infection that plagues only Singapore??? Or is it out there already affecting the world's population.....

We truly need innovative, creative, talented individuals out there to lead us out of this mediocrity..